Private Lessons Part 2Private Lessons Part 2, Boys and GirlsAuthor: TheCostumer

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nor is any intended.

Archiving: OK

Characters: Rogue, Magneto, Bobby, Charles & the "kids".Part of the

Tara@costumes.orgWhatever Remains Series

Rating: PG-13 for salacious Internet surfing.

Summary: The kids are pitched into jealous battles as the girls try to uncover secrets, and the boys teach Erik about the Internet. Mostly silly stuff.

Boys and Girls

"So what were you really doing in there?" Jubilee pressed again, apparently not accepting Professor Xavier's explanation that Rogue had been getting lessons in controlling her "gift" from "Magneto.

"I told you!" Marie snapped. "He's helping me to touch people without killing them."

"So?" Jubilee continued, wanting more information. "Like, where did you touch him?"

"Don't be gross!" Kitty objected.

"Oh shut up!" Jubilee countered. "You were looking

"Only because you made me!"

"Ohhhh. Poor widdle Kitty!" Jubilee taunted. "You like me because I 'make' you do stuff you want to do, and then you can blame me for it..."

Kitty blushed since it was uncomfortably close to the truth.

"I don't see why you are so interested." Rogue threw at them coolly, tossing her hair and implying that their fascination was both juvenile and perverse. She found she was getting quite good at sounding more sophisticated than she actually was, and generally everyone bought it.

Jubilee would have none of it this time though.

"So," she demanded again, "where did you touch him exactly?"

"His HAND." Rogue maintained angrily.

Jubilee snorted inelegantly. "That's not all, I heard."

Kitty blushed more than ever, as Rogue glared at her.

"All I said..." she began, in a whisper.

"You two are perfectly perverted in your ideas." Rogue interrupted in the cool tone she had used earlier. "The man is seventy or more."

"And you blackmailed him." Jubilee pressed with the tiny scrap of information she had. "what did you blackmail him with, I wonder?"

Rogue blushed, thinking that what she had blackmailed the Professor with would shock them all even more.

"And what is he doing for you in exchange?" Jubilee continued, making it sound like it had to be something quite rude.

"Oh, Jubes." Kitty put in. "It can't be anything like that! They were just talking about electricity after all..."

"You were listening in too!" Marie hissed, losing any semblance of cool in her outrage.

"Well, I ...."

Rogue didn't wait to listen to any explanation, but slammed out of the dorm in mortification and anger.

"I'm telling Professor Xavier!" she shouted as she left.

"Oh, dear." Kitty fretted.

"Hmm." Jubilee mused. "I wonder if there really is something going on there.."

"What do you mean?" Kitty asked in confusion. "Wasn't that the point?"

"Nah." Jubilee answered. "I didn't think so. But it is such a kick to get a rise out of her, I thought it would be fun."

"You mean you don't really think there was anything funny going on between them?"

"Of course not!" Jubilee gaped at her friend in amazement. "I mean the guy is seventy or something!"


After a pause, Jubilee asked Kitty: "You don't think there was anything really going on do you?"

"I guess not." Kitty admitted reluctantly.

"I mean," Jubilee continued, "Bobby is nuts to be jealous."

"I guess." Kitty said flatly.

"You guess?" Jubilee asked incredulously. "Like any red blooded girl would prefer that old fossil to a babe like Bobby Drake? Are you nuts?"

"Well," Kitty felt compelled to point out. "he's very nice. He didn't say anything mean at all when I fell through the wall. He just took me to the infirmary, and pretended everything was normal and all, and...." Kitty trailed off as was her wont.

"And..." Jubilee demanded.

"And....for a fossil," Kitty insisted, "he's pretty cute."

For the first time in their friendship, the loquacious Jubilee was at a loss for words.

"So Mister Lenscherr," Remy asked eagerly, "Would you like to see the computer lab?"

"That's all right." Erik tried shrugging him off, "I think I know the way."

"Oh, it's no problem." Remy insisted, and led him there anyway. Once there he still fussed at him. "Can I get you anything? Do you need help logging on?"

"NO." Erik said, more sharply than he wished to. "That is, I'll be fine, thank you."

"Do you need coffee or anything?" The boy asked, not seeing that Magneto wanted him gone.

"No." Erik maintained. "I just need some quiet time to send some e-mail."

"Oh." Remy finally took the hint and left.

Actually, Erik was dying for coffee, and had no idea how to log on, but he was tired of having Remy follow him like a puppy. He had no idea what he had done to earn the Cajun boy's hero worship, but it was wearing thin as an amusement after two days.

"He thinks if he hangs around you," a voice explained from a dark corner of the lab in a sepulchral tone, "that it will rub off."

"And, what," Erik asked Bobby, "is supposed to rub off?"

"What ever it is that you do for Rogue." Bobby replied, his normally cheery tone still absent.

"Ah." Erik sighed in comprehension. "I take it that Marie is very much admired by the boys here."

Nothing but a brooding silence emanated from the dark corner.

"You do know," Erik tried to assure the boy, "that all I'm doing is helping her practice touching people without killing them."

"That's what Professor Xavier said." Bobby said in a tone that implied he didn't believe the belated explanation the students received on Sunday night.

"You don't seem to realize that you are the most likely beneficiary, if we succeed." Erik bent a knowing smile in the direction of the corner, willing the boy to respond.

He did: "What do you mean?" Bobby inquired suspiciously.

"Well." Erik pointed out. "If Rogue can suddenly manage to touch people, who do you think she is likely to 'grab' first? Logan isn't here, I'm old enough to be her grandfather, and Mr. LeBeau, I sense, is the sort of boy who chases girls so much, they get in the habit of running away..."

"I don't know why you suppose she would..."

care about you?" Erik smiled, as Bobby emerged hopefully from the corner. "God," he thought, "was I ever as naive and easy to manipulate as this?" Heshifted a chair into place near his own, and the boy flopped into it. "Probably not."

"Do you think she does care?" Bobby asked.

"Definitely never as easy as this." Magneto decided, then said: "Well, she seemed rather concerned when you were knocked unconscious."

"She did?"

"Yes." He had Bobby's rapt attention now, and suddenly realized that he had charmed the boy like a snake, without having a useful reason for doing so. Of course, it never hurt to try to recruit allies or followers, but it struck him as funny that he was so much in the habit of doing so that he was automatically picking up admirers among Charles' students like his clothes picked up lint. What could he have the boy do that was useful?

"I don't suppose you could show me how to get on the Internet?" Erik asked, hopefully. "I was thinking that I might as well spend my spare time here catching up on all the computer things I've grown behind on in the last few years."

"I thought you said you were sending email." Bobby mentioned.

"I'm afraid I said that in order to get rid of Mr. LeBeau." Erik admitted, with a conspiratorial smile. "I'm afraid his chasing me about makes me want to run too..."

Bobby smiled back, and leaned forward to grab the mouse with pleasure. "Well, Mr. Lenscherr, " he said, enjoying the unaccustomed power that kids get when they know more about a subject than their professors do, "you are going to have lots of fun on the Internet."

Bobby was mooning over Rogue again and Kitty was highly irritated. Bobby seemed to have forgotten her existence entirely, and hadn't even apologized for knocking her through the wall in the three days since that humiliating incident.

For the first two days she could chalk up the omission to his own injuries, and the rather depressed way he had been moping about, nursing his own shame. But today, in their first class, he came in looking like a ray of sunshine, "Humming for heaven's sake!" she thought, and sat next to Rogue, not her as he'd done before. He topped it off by spending most of the hour flirting with Rogue, ogling Rogue, and passing stupid ice sculptures to Rogue, right under Kitty's nose.

The normally pacific Kitty was ready to kill. She just wasn't sure which of them she should kill first.

She was also feeling less than charitable towards the Professor, since he could hardly have missed what was going on, and yet hadn't said a word. Normally, he'd have jerked Bobby back to attention in an least he always did when Bobby flirted with her. Instead he smiled quietly to himself, and pretended not to see what Bobby was doing. Something was going on that made it all "different" and she was determined to figure out what it was.

Getting detention from Professor Xavier yesterday, had not sweetened her mood either. Rogue had "told" as threatened, and so she was stuck for hours doing an extra 10 page essay on "ethics" for punishment for the wall incident.

She couldn't confide in her friend, Jubilee, since Jubes and she had got in a fight on the very subject of Bobby's attractions two days before. Running to Jubes and complaining that Bobby was ignoring her after declaring again, only yesterday, falsely, that she thought he was only "so-so" looking, would sound like defeat.

So Kitty went off to a corner of the grounds to have lunch by herself, and figure out a plan for vengeance.

" Rogue, I'm getting concerned that with the short length of your lessons, Magneto may easily find the time to cook up some trouble." Professor Xavier began. He had pulled Marie aside during lunch for a private conference in his office.

"I'm sorry, Professor." Marie conceded. "It's just that the lessons haven't been going well at all, and I keep hurting Mr. Lenscherr."

"Hurting him?" Charles' incredulity at that statement was palpable. Rogue explained about the way the lessons were conducted, and Charles promised to try to think out a better method of working that might make longer lessons possible.

"However," he went on, "even if the lessons might be extended to go for an hour or two a day, they certainly would not be so time-consuming as to keep him out of trouble for an extended period." Charles thought he should impress upon Marie the dire consequences of her blackmail. Since Marie had created this dubious situation, he felt that sharing the trouble of dealing with it with her was appropriate. If she was going to play games with adults like Magneto, she would need to learn that there were responsibilities and problems that went along with such games.

"He has been fine so far, Professor" she pointed out. "He's settled into Logan's old room, and everything has been fine."

"It's been only three days, Rogue." Xavier countered. "Even Erik could not manage to hatch a whole new plan for world domination and the overthrow of the government in three days!"

"Well," Rogue asked, "does he have any other hobbies?"

Jubilee couldn't eat her lunch. Her curiosity was burning up her appetite. First, Professor Xavier pulled aside Rogue for a "private conference' that she was itching to find out about. She went looking for Kitty to help listening through the wall, only to find that her friend had run off somewhere and could not be found. That was second. Kitty seemed like she couldn't tie her shoelaces without asking Jube's opinion normally, yet obviously, she was now off doing something behind her back. It was so out of character, she wondered if Kitty was quite well, or had actually got bonked on the head a bit too hard when falling through the wall.

Then for thirds, she went to look for Remy and Bobby, to at least speculate and argue on what was going on in the Professor's office, and they were not out having lunch either. She realized that most of the other older boys were absent as well. Something very weird was going on, she was certain.

In a flash of inspiration, she headed for the computer room.

"All you need to do to find stuff is type in search terms to an engine like Google or AltaVista," Bobby explained to Erik. The fascinated throng of boys clustered around the monitor, eager to watch what Mr. Lenscherr might type in for his virgin surfing experience.

Erik decided not to type in anything that might be a problem if it got back to Xavier. He typed in the safest possible topics: "mutant" and "friendship" and hit the "enter" key.

Immediately, the screen filled with a list of sites.

"Now, you can click on each one, " Bobby added, "and see what the search brought up."

Erik did so, one at a time, experimentally.

"HOT MUTANT BABES WANT TO MEET YOU!" The first site announced in flashing block letters, as an animated slideshow of various scantily dressed and generously endowed "mutie" girls flicked in a loop on the right side of the screen. In a smaller font, the site said: "Correspond with mutant girls seeking pen-pals for friendship, love and marriage. Visa and MasterCard accepted."

Erik, torn between fascination and horror, gaped like a fish at this wonder of modern technology and communication.

Recovering quickly, he asked, "how do I get back to the list?"

"Hit the 'back' button." someone suggested.

He did so, repeatedly, but all that happened was his browser became entangled in a Java trap laid by the evil webmaster of the "HOT BABES" site. The screen was a whirr of scrolling text banners, pop up animated windows, and photos of half naked bodies, that steadfastly increased in numbers as he tried to exit.

Bobby, took control of the mouse, and with a few clicks forced the browser back to the list.

At the next site on the list, he was presented with an image of a pretty mutant woman, photographed rather badly, sitting on a beach somewhere in Indonesia. She too seemed unusually well endowed, and was wearing a rather virulently pink bathing suit in a size he would have judged to be rather too small for her figure. Her page declared, "I like long walks on the beach, Country Western Swing, and romantic movies." There was an irritating midi file that then loaded with a howl, that seemed to be an attempt at a rendition of "Stand by Your Man", but Erik couldn't be quite sure. He read on: "I am seeking friendship with a mature, marriage minded Christian gentleman, who wants children. Please send correspondence to..."

He backed out of that one as well, when "Stand by Your Man", or whatever it was, reached an ear splitting crescendo.

The next site appeared to be nearly a clone of the first, down to the colors of the fonts, however, the scantily dressed figures were male mutants, who, in this case were labeled: "Correspond with gay mutant boys seeking pen-pals for friendship, love and hot gay sex." Credit cards were also accepted there.

Bobby backed Erik out of a similar Java trap (including all the same pop up windows as before), and they reached a text-only page of mutant personals listings.

"DIMINUTIVE TOAD-BOY," one began in caps, "Longs to please...."

"Oh, God." Erik thought. "Morty still hasn't fixed that


Magneto read down several other ads in the listing, in simple curiosity at viewing this portion of the mutant world of which he had previously been unaware, but found himself faintly uncomfortable doing so with a flock of teenage boys watching his every move. He backed out of that page also, and went onto the next.

"Gay African-American Mutants for Christ" another page announced, " is a non-profit organization bringing together Gay mutant Christians for friendship, prayer, and dating. We meet regularly on Tuesday evenings at 7pm at the Baptist Church of Christ on Lombard Street....."

Jubilee decided that somebody must have slipped LSD into the O.J. this morning. She had no sooner discovered that Mr. Lenscherr was surfing sex sites with the boys in the computer room, than she caught Kitty slipping into his room furtively. Kitty never did anything like that without prodding.

She hovered in the hallway, and nabbed Kitty when she went out the wall again.

"EEkk!" Kitty squeaked in surprise.

"Shhh." Jubilee hissed. "They are all down the hall in the lab, keep your voice down."

"What are you doing here?" Kitty tried to ask casually, to poor effect.

"What am I doing here?" Jubilee hissed back, pulling Kitty downstairs into the comparative privacy of the main floor hallway. "What are YOU doing here? And what are you doing in Mr. Lenscherr's room?"

"Maybe we could get him interested in doing something non-violent that wastes a lot of time" Marie suggested to Xavier.

"What do you have in mind?"

"Well, Bobby said he was going to show him how to surf the Net today at lunch," Rogue said, "and lots of the kids spend hours and hours every day doing that..."

"Perhaps," Charles considered it was possible, "But I would prefer that he be scheduled into some sort of activity we can monitor. I was thinking that I might ask him to teach one of the subjects at the school, since the official explanation of his presence here, that we have been giving to the press, is that he has come here to teach."

"Perfect!" Rogue smiled at him brightly, thinking with annoyance that he had decided this before she ever came in, and had fretted away her hunch hour just to punish her for creating the situation in the first place.

"Not really a punishment," Xavier answered her thought, "more in the way of a lesson."

Rogue dropped the false smile and glared at the Professor.

He remained unperturbed. "You have in common with Erik the habit of jumping into actions without considering all the negative consequences."

"So what subject have you decided he should teach?" Rogue changed the topic.

"Well, physics is his forte, as is one of mine, and I could ask him to cover my classes, on the grounds I've been feeling poorly."

"Yes but how long can you convince him of that?"

"Not long I fear." Charles smiled at her, "I have to admit, I'm feeling positively cheery lately that he is here again. We had planned the school, and built it, with the intent we should both run it together. I can't help hoping that if we can keep him here long enough that he gets involved in the students and the school, that we could belatedly bring him back into the fold."

Rogue doubted this, but felt that if it were possible, Magneto would probably like that as much as the Professor would. She was certain that the years he had spent with Charles in Westchester, setting the place up, were among Erik's happiest.

"Is there a subject," she asked, "that you don't presently teach, that Mr. Lenscherr could start teaching?"

Charles appeared to consider that for a moment, then brightened with an almost evil grin.

"There is not only one," he said, "but two! What is more, they are both subjects he berated me for not putting into the planned curriculum. He won't be able to resist if I tell him I've decided I was wrong, and want to include them."

"So?" Rogue was excited, she didn't remember "remembering" anything about this. "What are they?"

"Combat," Xavier said, "and Applied Physics."

"What is 'Applied Physics'?" Rogue asked.

"It's where you make things, like that Mutation machine, or Cerebro, or any other invention of the sort---Erik loves that kind of thing, and he his very good at it."

"Isn't that dangerous?" Rogue asked, not anxious to find herself experimentally strapped to the latest fun device Magneto might create, class project or not.

"With a dozen teenagers 'helping' him every minute?" Charles scoffed, "How much trouble can he get into with Bobby, St. John and Remy looking over his shoulder the whole time?"

"Mutant Teens and their Pets" was the next title that appeared on the screen, and Erik wondered why, with such a safe, wholesome subject as "The natural friendship between girls and their favorite animals", he would have to click on a "You must be over 18 to enter" button to actually see the teens with their favorite animals.

After he did, he was in no doubt about why. Nothing the High Evolutionary ever did with livestock mutation really seemed quite as perverse as what these otherwise squeaky clean "farm girl" looking young ladies seemed to be doing with their 4-H projects.

"It seems," Erik finally concluded, "that Senator Kelly is actually right about something after all. There does seem to be a lot of sex on the Internet."

"Yeah!" Remy enthused. "Isn't it great?!!"

"I want to get even with Rogue for ratting on me to the Professor." Kitty told her friend with unaccustomed vigor. Her motivations vis-à-vis Bobby she wasn't ready to share with Jubilee yet.

"So?" Jubilee hung on to her original question, like a dog on a bone. "What does that have to do with Magneto's room? You aren't seriously hot after him, are you?"

"No!" She popped back, thinking they had been through this before. "I was in his room because it was Logan's old room. I was looking to see if he left anything behind that I could use to annoy Rogue."

"That is so lame." Jubilee snorted. "Did you find anything?"

"Not really." Kitty admitted with a sigh.

"And you didn't even bother to go through Mr. Lenscherr's stuff?"

"Well, I did a bit," she admitted "in case I might find out something useful, but there wasn't really anything interesting there either."

"Well, he had two big suitcases full of stuff on Sunday," Jubilee pointed out. "There must have been something in them!"

"Lots of clothes, mostly," she said, then considered: "there was one weird thing, he had five steel ball bearings, about the size of golf balls in with his socks."

Marie was finally allowed to leave and eat by Xavier.

She was cynically thinking that she would have all of five minutes to scarf down her lunch before History class, and so was running out the door without looking.

"He has STEEL BALLS??!!" Jubilee exclaimed, as Rogue nearly bumped into Kitty, then stopped, hands on hips, looking at both of them with scorn.

"You two!" Rogue sneered, "Don't you ever think about anything but sex?"

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